It’s been a long year. The season doesn’t feel like the season: there’s fear and animosity and Sting has a new album out, it’s madness! There are a few things you can do to get into the holiday spirit. You could take a bunch of pills and listen to Bing Crosby until you forget what day it is. You kidnap any old fat man with a white beard and refuse to release him until he hears your Christmas wish. Or you could do the smart thing and turn on the Hallmark Channel and watch the 24/7 Christmas movie-kakke that’s running. Classics like A Boyfriend for Christmas, A Bride for Christmas, A Princess for Christmas, Love at the Thanksgiving Day Parade, The Christmas Forest, The Dog Who Saved Christmas, The Christmas Secret, The Magic Nativity, Hitched for the Holidays, or A Night Out for Mrs. Claus. (Only three of those are made up.) Do you want to remember why the holidays are magical? Do you want to see a single mother and a lonely widower (or vice versa) fall in love despite initial misgivings? Do you want to know what Eric McCormack or Lori Loughlin or Lacey Chabert or Joey Lawrence or countless Canadian day players have been up to? Well then turn on Hallmark, unplug all the clocks, and slip into a Christmas coma. That’s what we did. And what did we get out of it? A brand new sketch comedy show! Come out and see our annual Holiday Show on Saturday, December 10th at 8pm and 10pm at Dojo Comedy! We’ll remind you what the holidays are all about… or more accurately what they shouldn’t be about… All new sketches! So come out and see us, ya Grinch. Get your tickets here!
Once a year, when the chill creeps through the darkness, the wind whispers gently and summons from the deepest corners the abyss the things that haunt our dreams. Call them ghosts or ghouls or demons or devils, they come once a year to demand their due. And their Dew, because if anything is true of terrifying spirits it’s that they love Mountain Dew. You may think these are nothing more than campfire tales. But we’re not taking any changes. That’s why we’re offering our tribute to the evil things with a brand new sketch comedy show. A haunting, wicked, and probably grammatically suspect sketch comedy show with all new sketches, spells, potions, and other weird stuff. Come check it out on Friday, October 28 AND Saturday, October 29 at 8pm and 10pm at Dojo Comedy. Bring Mountain Dew…there’s Hell to Pay this year. Get your tickets now!
Backpacks? Check! Bikes? Check! Girl with telekinetic powers and persistent nose bleeds? CHECK! Waaaaait a minute -what’s she doing here? And where the hell are all my goddamn Eggos?! C’mon guys!! Ohhh…she knows about the place? Oh boy. And the stuff we did there?? Oh jeez. Well I guess she has to come then. But don’t tell anyone else, OK? You told everybody?! This is bad…this is very bad!! Alright, here’s the plan: meet us at the portal at Dojo Comedy on September 17. We’re gonna feed the monster brand new sketches and hope it stops eating our friends. Get your Portal Passes Here and for the love of Pete (also eaten by monster) bring googles!
During our travels in which we have secured much glory for the gods, we have lost in battle a great warrior, slain in combat as we all pray to be. He sailed more seas, conquered more lands, and pillaged with less mercy than any warrior before him. He earned his place in Valhalla and he deserves a true Viking funeral. And so we shall bury him by sending his body out to sea and lighting it with a flaming arrow (which is totally a real thing and not at all a Hollywood construct that makes very little sense considering the cost of ships at the time and the actual burning temperature needed to cremate a body). And we will feast to him with fatty meat shanks. And we will drink mead at long wooden tables that we will bang with our fists. And as a final honor to the warrior that conquered for the glory of Odin we present a sketch comedy show from Brick Penguin featuring all new sketches at the Nordic temple known as Dojo Comedy on July 30 at 8pm and 10pm. So if you do not want to face the hammer of Thor get your tickets now!
This is not a drill! We repeat: This is not a drill! We are at a Code Seven – Quebec Alert – Magenta Level. This is real! This thing is now a thing! All systems are to operate on frequency Eight. Report to Squad Leader who will report to Legion Leader who will report to Command Central, which will send instructions to Legion Leaders, who in turn will relay instructions to Squad Leaders, who will disseminate orders to each agent via e-vite secure communication invitation system. As you await instruction, make sure to take shelter at Dojo Comedy for Brick Penguin’s brand new sketch show on June 11 at 8pm and 10pm. Make sure to watch intently as the members of Brick Penguin will be giving valuable and dangerously acquired intel to agents through codes in their sketches. Also there will be jokes about butts and stuff. We trained for this, people! Get your tickets here! The operation depends on it.
Your parents are out for the night at some adult party so what do you do? Tell your friends to come over, lock the babysitter in the bathroom, and get ready to watch some stuff your parents don’t let you: It’s rumpus time! We’ve got a brand new sketch comedy show on Saturday, April 23 at Dojo Comedy at 8pm and 10pm and your parents would HATE it. But your parents are totally lame, right? And what they don’t know can’t hurt ‘em. So come out and see the all new sketches. You’ll be the coolest kid at school. And from there you can start smoking and lighting stuff on fire in the park. Life is gonna be great! Get your tickets here.
Valentine’s Day is a time for romance and love. A special day when you and your sweetheart can profess your love through your thoughtful words and your caring actions. It’s a day to celebrate the goodness and purity of true love. Well.. this show isn’t on Valentine’s Day so forget that garbage. Brick Penguin is back with a brand new sketch show to say forget about love, let’s get laid. Leave your love letters, candy hearts, and underwear at home, because this show is gonna be sweaty, nasty, and as raw as the Wu Tang Clan likes it. Join us on February 27 at Dojo Comedy at 8pm or 10pm to see all new sketches that will leave you craving. Bring a towel. Get your tickets here!
We all think we know a lot about Santa Claus: he has a beard, he has a workshop up north, he has eight reindeer… Well, he also has skeletons in the closet, dirty little secrets he doesn’t want us talking about. Did you know that he’s from Greece? Don’t you think it’s a little disconcerting that he has a list of addresses of “naughty” children? Why haven’t we ever really seen him and Tim Allen in the same room? This Christmas thing is dirty and we know exactly how how high up this goes: the North Pole. Come check out our 5th Annual Holiday Show on December 12 at Hamilton’s Bar (not the Hamilton) at 8pm and 10pm to get to the bottom of this thing. It’ll be full of brand new sketches, candy canes, presents, and cold hard truth about Dirty Ol’ St Nick. Get your tickets here!
Hell is out there, people, and we need to be ready to go there. Whether you think it’s a lake of fire, an eternal torture chamber, or Buffalo, you’d better start packin’. We think we have a pretty good idea what’s in store for us when we’re forced to answer for our questionable sketch comedy and that other thing we did on Arbor Day. Our hell is an arcade where some kid you really hate just beat your high score in skee ball and everyone is saying you’re not the champion anymore so you start pumping quarters in but you keep rolling 10s or, even worse, you tip off the 50s and drop down to the ten. And you keep getting frustrated because Eric is laughing at you and bragging to Kim Fitzpatrick about how awesome he is at skee ball. The more frustrated you get the more it knocks you off your game and you are now sometimes throwing the skee balls off the track entirely. And you just get madder and madder because Kim probably thinks he’s such a great skee ball player when it was all luck and now she’s never gonna want to be in your group for the language arts project… ah… I hate ERIC!… Anyway. Come celebrate your inevitable damnation at our annual HALLOWEEN SHOW on Saturday, Oct 24 (8pm and 10pm) at Dojo Comedy. All brand new sketches! There’ll be goblins, and demons, and hot nurses, and all the other things we associate with the Devil. Get your tickets here.
Hey, so, um, you know, like, Homecoming is coming up pretty soon. Yeah, I know it’s totally lame. Only squares go to Homecoming. But, I was thinking about it and, like, I don’t know, it might be kinda funny if we went together. Just to, like, make fun of all the dweebs who are there having fun and showing school spirit or whatever. Yeah, and we could, like, show them how useless it is by, ya know, dancing with each other. Everybody would be like “whaaa?” Oh… no, i was kidding. No! I was totally joking with you. There’s no way I would go to that. Instead we should go see a brand new Brick Penguin sketch comedy show at Dojo Comedy (3503 Georgia Ave NW) with all new sketches on Friday, September 25 at 8pm and 10pm. Get your tickets here.